The Lost Popsicle

The following post, circa 2011, when Sam was 8. I was reminded recently when I looked for my old
Blogspot account - and to my amazement, still found it and retrieved many of my old writings. This was written smack dab during monumental loss for Greg and I that involved a once desired job that Greg ultimately was led to turn down. It had appeared to be the answer to our prayers, the longing of our hearts to move into something new - but as details unfolded, we recognized God’s warning, '“red flags” if you will and disappointingly said no. Then we had to sit in the reality of no change in a season of dryness and longing. But - the Lord. He is so unfailingly kind to us.

Summer 2011

A few weeks ago, I caved and let my son Sam purchase something from the ice cream truck. This came after many of his pursuits..usually at 10:00 am ..or 8:30pm....or better yet, 12 pm, right during lunch. The ding ding man fails to have impeccable timing, which was mostly why I always would tell my kids "Not today". But this day was different. We had just finished lunch and began putting away our dishes when we all heard the familiar "ding ding" of the van moving slowly down our street.

When did they become vans? I prefer the truck.

Sam and Wes ran into the kitchen with big hopeful smiles...and I said, "OK".

I reached into my purse and to my amazement, actually had about $10 worth of cash on me, I never have cash. :/ I gave them each $1 and they busted out the front door and ran about 1/2 a block where the van slowed and came to a stop once it spotted the blissful children. I watched during the exchange and then as they proudly were coming back toward home, Wes with his blue raspberry popsicle, and Sam with a bright green lime popsicle. I went back to my work in the kitchen. It felt good to delight their little hearts in such a simple way..and without the guilt of ruining their lunch or dinner. ;)

A few moments later, Sam came out from the hallway which leads to our bathroom. He was quite long faced, quivering bottom lip and on the verge of tears. I noticed something missing as I said "Where did your popsicle go?" With a burst of emotion, he let out, "IT FELL IN THE TOILET!!!!!!" I paused for a moment as I imagined what had happened. Living in a house of boys, I've had quite the education on bathroom behavior...and I quickly figured it out. To waste no time with the new popsicle, it made sense to Sam to put the treat in his mouth WHILE using the bathroom. I'm sure devastation hit when he realized he was still "going" and the lime goodness was slipping from his mouth and into the toilet.

My first reaction was to laugh..but then I realized how upset my son was. His sheer excitement and fun had quickly turned to sheer disappointment and loss. We sat on the sofa while he cried and I encouraged him that there would be more ice cream "vans" in the future. I then reminded him that next time it might not be such a good idea to use the bathroom while eating, …anything. He composed himself and went out to play. Every so often throughout the day he came back in, and the memory of what had happened caused him to tear up, and even let out a cry.

A few days later his opportunity came again, and I mercifully and gladly gave in, and watched him savor the lime popsicle on the front porch even though it was 5pm …right before dinner.

Among many many blessings, I also have lost a few “popsicles” in my lifetime,..and lately the metaphor has rung ever true. As I have been walking through some deep disappointment, my tendency is to try and hold on to pieces of what is lost. But, to try and retrieve the popsicle from the toilet is not what I want either. Ha! It is irretrievable, not to mention not as appetizing as it once was. Ha! Ha! It is so very hard, but I know that I can trust God for His timing and more opportunities because of who He is. He is unfailingly good. He specializes in grace and mercy too..and in the meantime I am learning and growing in character.